Description of the way to raise a boy child to counteract his tendencies to aggressive behavior is the main objective of this essay. In the article, titled “The Gender Blur: Where Does Biology End and Society Take Over?” Deborah Blum sets out to explore the role played by biology in determining human behavior. In her sentiments, she maintains that in order to understand gender differences it is imperative to take into account both nurture and nature. Blum argues that testosterone has a role to play in determining the level of aggression among boys, and in addition, society has a role in activating the hormone. As such, there is a need to raise a boy child in a way that counteracts the aggressive behavior.
Boy child develops more aggressive behavior than a girl child because of testosterone, the male sex hormone that is responsible for making boys grow physically larger and behave more aggressively. Stressful situation activates the levels of the testosterone released in the body, and the child behaves more aggressively. As such, parent should ensure that a boy child is brought up in the stress free and relaxed environment. The child should, however, be raised in a friendly and lovely environment that guarantees quietness and kindness. This will ensure that the child is instilled with virtues of tolerance and gentleness.
Family life plays a pivotal role in preventing aggressive behavior among boys. During the toddler years up to preschool, it is necessary to give a boy child a secure and stable home life. This is coupled with unyielding, loving discipline as well as around the clock supervision. Everyone taking care of the child should serve as a first-rate role model; furthermore, he should follow the rules that need to be observed as well as the right channel of response if there is an act of disobedience. When a child breaks a significant rule, it is essential to reprimand him immediately so that the child understands exactly the mistake he has done. This means that parents or caregivers have a responsibility to play since get to be familiar with the rules of the domicile through teaching. As such, caregivers should teach children less-aggressive behaviors. Exploring and touching objects are the main interests of toddlers, in instances, when there are valuables that children should not touch, caregivers should hide or remove them out of reach. Parents should set up a place where a boy child can play with toys or books (Blum 28).
Effectiveness of discipline can be achieved if it is carried as an ongoing process, and not only when a boy child misbehaves. Truly, it should begin with caregivers being in good spirits at their jovial baby, and it carries on with genuine affection and admiration of apt and positive behaviors. In the long-run, when a child feels respected and encouraged rather than embarrassed and humiliated, there is a high possibility that he or she will listen, change as well as learn when necessary. In fact, it is more effective when caregivers positively reinforce behaviors that are suitable and desired, and at the same time teach a child alternative behaviors relative to calling them off, by saying, “Stop it” or else. In addition, to teaching a child other approaches of responding, it will also be prudent to distract him, or attempt another approach. Provided the caregiver is not bribing the child to change his behavior or behave differently. Bribing can be in the form of offering sweets or snacks. There is nothing wrong when a child changes his focus intentionally, and as such, caregivers should encourage the child to do so without intervention.
The caregiver should also remember that the boy child has little self-control instinct. This means that the child needs the caregiver to teach him when not to hit, bite or kick, when angry. The child should be taught that feelings could be expressed using words rather than aggressive behavior. The child should be able to discover the dissimilarity between imagined and real insults, as well as between defending his rights and launching an attack out of anger. These lessons can be taught best through close supervision of the child when caught up in disputes with others. In instances, where the disagreement is minor, the caregiver should leave the children to solve the dispute on their own. Nonetheless, the caregiver should intervene if the disagreement is building up into a physical fight, and the children have refused to stop after being told to bring to an end, or when one child seems to be developing an uncontrollable rage and this has resulted to assault and biting of the other. The caregiver should pull the disputing children apart and ensure that they are separated until they calm down. In addition, it should be made clear to the children that it does not matter who started the fight, but such behavior cannot be tolerated.
A child should be taught how to deal with anger, especially in high-risk situations. The child should know that no matter what the situation is, he should not resort to aggressive behavior. A child should be taught to say “no” firmly, or to find compromises, as well as to turn his back instead of resorting to a fight. Through example, caregiver should teach him that it is more effective to settle differences by use of words, and it is a more civilized way compared to physical violence. Caregiver should appreciate him for appropriate behavior and by extension make clear to him how “gentleman” he is whenever he acts appropriately instead of using aggression. When a child demonstrates gentleness and kindness, he should be reinforced for his behavior. The caregiver can use time-out as the last resort. Time-outs involve having the child go to an uninteresting place or sit in a chair whenever he acts inappropriately. This will ensure that the child is separated from his misconduct and given sufficient time to cool off. This is coupled with an explanation highlighting what is being done, and why, however, long lectures should be avoided. For young children, time-outs should be ended when they become quiet and still. This is because ending time-outs at such a situation will strengthen this behavior. The child will discover that time-outs signify “quietness and stillness.” The child will learn how to calm himself; however, time-in should be initiated when giving positive attention after the appropriate behavior (McDonnell 36).
External environment affects the behavior of a child, and as such, caregivers should watch their behaviors whenever they are around the child. The best way to teach a child the desired behavior is by controlling his/her own temper. A child will follow the behavior of the caregiver, and as such, if the caregiver will express his/her anger in a peaceful and quiet manner, a child will imitate that example. When disciplining a child, mixed reactions should not be expressed. Mixed reactions involve feeling guilty and apologizing after administering discipline. If the child notices the mixed reactions, he will feel that he was right, and the caregiver is the one who is wrong. Disciplining a child is necessary and forms a part of parenthood, though, it is unpleasant for parents to feel guilty. The child should pinpoint situations when he is wrong so that he can take responsibility for the misconduct and be able to accept the consequences willingly (Obsuth 49).
I do hold the sentiments that human behavior is a factor of nature and nurture, and, as such, biological and societal factors play a pivotal role in shaping ones behavior. In addition, the behavior of an individual is copied or inherited from parents and again parents have a key role to play in raising a child in to desired and appropriate behavior. However, I do not agree to the argument that human behavior is embodied on the hormonal make-up of a child. This is because hormones alone cannot activate a certain behavior, but it requires individual effort to trigger the functional hormone. As such, in behavior development nurture come first before nature in order to realize a certain behavior. In other words, aggressive behavior among boys is not only a factor of hormonal response but is also attributable to the external environment.
In conclusion, human behavior is not fixed, but flexible and any external influence can shape it in either way. It is imperative to ensure the necessary approaches in order to guarantee an upbringing that is desirable and appropriate. Parents or caregivers have an enormous role to play in shaping the behavior of a child. Caution should be taken in nearly every aspect or situation since a child can copy behaviors.
Obedience is a virtue that enables someone to be in agreement with, to comply, respect or conform to something. Individuals will only be obedient to someone or of something because of fear of the consequences. Only those who are courageous enough will tend disobey. For instance, a young child will obey his or her parent just because of the fear of the cane. If it is not of the consequences, the child will disobey the parent. This is referred to as a blind obedience since it is as one is being forced to conform.