Domestic Violence against Men

Concrete Experience: A couple recently experienced a cancelled trip due to the inability by the man to get the money as planned. After the wife had received the distressing news, she became so aggressive and assaulted the husband. She expressed her disappointment and rage by verbally abusing him, threw objects at him, and raised a lot of accusations to him. All these she did in the publicly in front of people. He felt terribly embarrassed because the wife told him off in public, in front of her clients. Furthermore, she deprived him sex and even refused to cook confirming that she was abusing him physically and emotionally.

Reflective Observation: Despite being honest, informing her about the cancellation at her work place was not the best approach. I found no compelling reason to retaliate although I was so emotional and distressed. I continued meeting her emotional needs as a husband.

Formation of Generalizations: Men consider physical assault or humiliating a man emotionally in front of other men to be abusive. Professionals observe that emotional and mental abuse are areas where women are often more "brutal" than men. Culturally it is not easy for men to bring such incidents to the public or to the attention of the authorities.

Application in New Situations: One can use the experience and information to calm down domestic violence against men. Additionally, I will be able to identify the signs and address the cause of the vice with my future partner as well as establish a solution. Moreover, the experience and knowledge will help advise couples going through the same situations.

Family Attitudes
Concrete Experience: A man recently reported that to his parents and parents in law that his wife physically and emotionally abused him. He explained to them that the wife locked him in the room and bit him up. To his surprise, both parents and his family got astonished and could not believe him. They told him that he was the one abusing her. His family in-law distanced their daughter from the claims.

Reflective Observation: one can learn that there is little involvement of the extended family whenever abuse occurs. Reporting abuse of men to the immediate family does not offer the ground for channeling the allegations. It did not produce any solution but aggravated the issue.

Formation of generalizations: Extended family does not find violence against men as realistic. Johnsons (2000) theorized that the society expects a man to be stronger than women in all matters and cannot be victims of family abuse. The society may portray the abused man as weak and not able to stand as a man. The impact of domestic violence against men is less apparent and less likely to receive attention of the extended family. Secondly, men get hurt more by emotional abuse than physical abuse. The extended family cannot establish authenticity of claims of emotional abuse by men.

Application in New Situations: I will employ this knowledge to address the societies’ little response to claims of violence against men. Secondly, basing on the information, I will counsel couples on seeking professional advice rather than the rushing for the extended family’s help.

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